LISTS
8 Op-Eds David Swensen Wrote For The Record That Received No National News Coverage
If I Really Wanted To, I Could Make Yale’s Endowment Even Bigger
Since When Is My Sex Dungeon A For-Profit Prison?
Yale Isn’t...
Seven Musical Moments That Solved Global Ills
1954: Frank Sinatra releases “Fly Me to the Moon,” a little tune that goes on to inspire President Kennedy’s greatest accomplishment: his response to...
LOL: These Foolish Apartment Hunters Were Tricked Into Buying Rooms With No Walls Or Ceilings
Bet these bozos are wishing they read the fine print before signing their lease...
No ceiling or walls…AND a slanted, unfinished floor? That's why you...
Five Ways Your Son’s Body Will Change As He Experiences the Magic of Puberty
Facial Hair
As your son undergoes puberty, he will begin to grow a half blonde, half brown goatee. Do not be alarmed. This is...
NEWSROOM
Freshman Screw Renamed To First-Year Fuckathon
New Haven, CT — In accordance with the change from “freshman” to “first-year” enacted in September, Yale administrators announced this week that the annual...
Burning Pile of 274,000 Dollar Bills To Headline Spring Fling
NEW HAVEN, CT — In a surprise announcement Wednesday night at Toad’s, it was revealed that, rather than procuring a lineup of performers for...
Econ Department Unveils “Accounting and the Good Life” Course
NEW HAVEN — Citing declining enrollment and life satisfaction among majors, the economics department announced Thursday that it would offer a course in “Accounting...
“Told You So” Says Karl Marx To Dead Black Friday Shoppers
HEAVEN -- In the wake of one of the most brutal Black Fridays in recorded history, sources say that German political philosopher Karl Marx...
Student Looks at Pinboard
NEW HAVEN, CT — Yesterday, amidst gasps from onlooking passers-by, Susie Marks ‘21 actually looked at the pinboard on Cross Campus. According to sources, Marks...
“Just To Piggyback Off That Thought For A Second,” Reports First-Year Seminar Student, About To Piggyback Off That Thought For A Second
NEW HAVEN, CT – When Alex McNeil ‘21 began shopping his first-year seminar, “Art of the Science of the Modern Technology of Public Policy...
Hurricane Irma Unprepared for Florida
TALLAHASSEE, FL—As Hurricane Irma hurdles towards Florida’s coast, the state’s notoriously brash residents are gearing up to fight the storm.
“We’ll show Irma what Floridians...
BREAKING: Marvin Chun Named Marvin
In a 1967 birth, psychology and neuroscience professor Marvin Chun was named Marvin by his parents, University President Peter Salovey announced in a Thursday...
