Heaven Is A Deal by Michael Gerber

“I’m allergic to horses,” Philip said. “I would like to see some penguins, please.” One thing I will say for Mr. Nerd, he was very polite.

“In a minute, Phil,” I said, just to get under the kid’s skin. “First, I’d like to play…” I looked to Bob: little help, here?

“…Spaceman,” Bob said in a chipper tone of voice. “Do you like rockets?”

“Yes.”

“Then sit in this chair, and we’ll get started!”

“Do you know there are eight planets? There used to be nine, but then they said that Pluto”—Philip pushed away the mask. “I don’t want that, it smells like Mom’s swimming cap.”

“But that’s your space mask,” Bob said. “You can’t go into space without a mask. There’s no air.”

“Oh, right, I remember that.” Philip put the mask on happily. “Grandma took me to IMAX in Des Moines and we saw…” He yawned. “I’m getting tired, Mr. Creepo. I want to go home.”

“I’ll take you home right after we play space, okay buddy?” Lord in Heaven, who knew this was going to be so difficult?

“O…kay…” Philip was out like a light. Ten minutes later, he and I were talking about Jesus.

8: THE MAN YOU MEET WHEN YOU DIE

Philip, Griselda and I were sitting in my car outside Phil’s parents house, the tape player rolling. It was just past five thirty, and the boy would be home by suppertime, things were going perfectly. “When you were playing space, did you meet anybody?”

“Yes.”

Hot dang. “Was it a man?”

“Yes,” Philip said, yawning. “Can I go home?”

Griselda touched his arm. “Just a few more questions. Was it pretty?”

“Yes…There were lots of colors.”

“Really?” My heart leapt. Here was absolute, incontrovertible proof! How could this little boy possibly know that The Bible says,

“And the building of the wall of it was [of] jasper: and the city [was] pure gold, like unto clear glass. And the foundations of the wall of the city [were] garnished with all manner of precious stones. The first foundation [was] jasper; the second, sapphire; the third, a chalcedony; the fourth, an emerald; The fifth, sardonyx; the sixth, sardius; the seventh, chrysolite; the eighth, beryl; the ninth, a topaz; the tenth, a chrysoprasus; the eleventh, a jacinth; the twelfth, an amethyst. And the twelve gates [were] twelve pearls; every several gate was of one pearl: and the street of the city [was] pure gold, as it were transparent glass.”

He’d been there! Philip had really been in Heaven! Now, to get some details that the Nebraska kid didn’t have. “Tell me about this man you met. Was he tall?”