Class Of 2016 Receives Illuminati Invitations

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In an email sent Tuesday morning, President Peter Salovey officially invited the entire Class of 2016 to join the Illuminati.

“I understand that some of you received your invitations and member cards earlier than others, particularly if you joined Skull and Bones, Wolf’s Head, or Scroll and Key; however, we at Yale believe in equal opportunity for all, and that includes the opportunity to access the tools necessary for world domination,” Salovey wrote.

Thanks to one anonymous student, part of the email is reproduced below.

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According to one source, the member card read simply, “Everyone knows that the most important A is not on your transcript. It’s between the Y and the L.”

In keeping with tradition, the invitation sang.  

—K. Kidney

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