The Pentagon is currently working on drones able to seek and destroy targets without any human control whatsoever. What are some even worse ideas?
• Drones that CAN be controlled by humans
• Nuclear bombs with borderline personality disorder
• Auto-eating food
• Toy handguns that shoot real bullets
• Ruinously expensive post-colonial interventions in random countries’ affairs on the flimsiest of pretexts
• All these bleeding hearts who don’t think American citizens should be able to walk the streets with as many drones able to seek and destroy targets without any human control whatsoever as they damn well choose
• Letting that one crazy-haired scientist guy experiment with artificial intelligence alone, unsupervised, on a secret military installation on an island off the coast of Maine
• Ice milk, yuck.
—Staff (Chernicoff, Kemper, Klumpp)
