1. 5 Dog tears 
  2. A heaping scoop of creatine powder
  3. Sweat from your local gym bro 
  4. All 14 pieces of Godiva’s Valentine’s Day Assorted Chocolate Gift Box, pre-digested
  5. ½ lb. ground chuck 
  6. 1 tbsp of Jacob Elordi’s bathwater
  7. 2 pumps of “South Seas Blend” syrup from Commons
  8. 800mg children’s Tylenol
  9. Peace and understanding in Eastern Europe

Mix all together and imbibe responsibly!

(The legal drinking age in the state of Connecticut is 21.)

– A. Lehman

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