1. The Salsa Fresca $5 Student Meal – A burrito, chips, and soda ALL for $5? Money well-spent and one pound well gained!
  2. Free food – Yale is a fantastic place to obtain free food from various events, Nothing tastes better than a piece of free pizza, except for maybe the one free pound that comes with it. Bonus!
  3. “Yale’s Creamy Macaroni & Cheese” – Every night before bed, I pray that tomorrow, God will bless me with this dish in the dining hall and the one heavenly pound it will bring.
  4. Buttery – A quesadilla, can of soda, and candy bar ALL for $2? Money even better spent and one pound even better gained!
  5. Weekend Brunches – For the first few weeks, nothing gets a hung-over freshman out of bed and one pound heavier on a Saturday like brunch: the week’s most elegant meal.
  6. Chapel St. Restaurants – When you’re sick of the dining hall, take your pick of what the outside world has to offer. You’ll spend a little money, but you’ll gain one pound in return!
  7. Cheesecake bars – One of the best desserts the dining hall serves. You’ll want to nab an extra bar (and one extra pound) for later.
  8. Alcohol – One tequila, two tequila, three tequila…one pound more.
  9. Stolen Dining Hall Food –You may soon realize that those cold mashed potatoes and the one pound they bring aren’t worth the fridge space they take up. But for now…load up your Tupperware!
  10. Alpha Delta Pizza—There’s nothing like experiencing the midnight miracle that is a Wenzel delivered right to your doorstep and the one pound delivered right to your midsection.
  11. Durfee’s chicken tenders – 1 meal swipe + 3 soggy chicken tenders + 1 sugary soda + 1 bag of Doritos = one cost-effective pound
  12. Lack of portion control – One serving of pasta is half a cup, but that seems cruel. Fill up your plate…it’s been a hard week and you’ve earned that one pound.
  13. Stress-eating – Two papers and a midterm in one week? Good thing you’ve got an entire party-sized bag of Doritos to get you through it. You’ll gain an A and one pound…score!
  14. Even more stress-eating – Oops…make that two papers and two midterms and one more pound.
  15. Laziness – You could go to Payne Whitney gym…or you could sit on your bed taking in season four of Orange is The New Black and gaining that one final pound. It’s a no brainer!

—N. Eskow

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