This article originally appeared in the War on Christmas Issue.


I am first and foremost a family man. I have a lovely elf-wife and two wonderful half-elf children. My wife and I see a lot of ourselves in them. Our eldest son has taken after my love of chess and the outdoors and my wife’s love of hollowing out trees to bake cookies in. Our youngest daughter looks like both of us: she has my black curly hair and her mother’s leathery feet. She is not a “dirty mutt.”

Stop posting on the Nextdoor app about the “guy with the elf-fetish.” Start posting about the guy with the beautiful half-elf family.


—H. Rubin