-While hanging out with friends in a ‘90s teen movie where the others have to learn a lesson about safety and friendship
-In the ocean, but while wearing a really fun hat
-While beating a dolphin at chess, finally proving who is smarter
-While in a dunk tank at a carnival—because you didn’t wait 30 minutes after eating that fried Snickers bar and corn dog
-In queso, while holding a bag of chips
-With Morgan Freeman narrating it
-While playing catch with your old man in the backyard then realizing that it’s actually a Kraken wearing your dad’s favorite shirt and you’re 20,000 leagues under the sea
-While eating soup, but, like, fun soup
-In soda after an especially hard Lent without caffeinated drinks
-While splashing in puddles after a biblical rain storm
-While eating a surprisingly deep bowl of sugary cereal that your mom finally let you buy
-Just in regular water, if you’re into that
—J. Lancione
