This article originally appeared in the Sponsored Issue.
- Spotify Foster Family Plan: Every Discover Weekly playlist has one song not quite like the others.
- Spotify Divorced Family Plan: You only get to listen to your favorite music every other weekend. On other days, you can listen to white noise to cover up the sound of Dad crying.
- Spotify Family Plan(ning): Every time you listen to Marvin Gaye, we’ll send you a complimentary morning-after pill.
- Spotify Vintage: Essentially a Blockbuster, but with CD’s.
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- Spotify for Graduate Students: Full price. What are you going to do about it: have a hunger strike?
—Staff