Urinary tract infections
World War II
World War IX
Not World War I, strangely
Surprise parties
Women
The number 3
The ghost of George Washington
What the ghost of George Washington will do to anyone who so much as smiles at Martha when he’s gone
What the ghost of George Washington will do to anyone who thinks he’s fucking joking
The number 3, again, over and over for about an hour and in a little girl’s voice for some reason
Bees
—B. Rudeen & C. Rudeen