Reel Love @ Yale: A Dating Service For And By Fishermen Nov 12, 2020 Are you tired of the same old boring college dates? The same landlocked meals of meat, poultry, grains, fruit, and vegetables? Well then, sounds like you could use some Reel Love®, the only Yale dating service that pairs you with a big, burly fisherman who will reel in your heart like an Atlantic chub mackerel. Fill out this questionnaire, and you’ll have one on the line in no time. Age (you) 18 19 20 21+ Age range (your match) 39-42 43-46 60 Old enough to tell a schooner from a cockleshell, that’s for damn sure How would you describe your fishing experience level? Advanced (Scourge of the Sea) Intermediate (Lord of the Lake) Beginner (Prince of the Pond) None (I Am Excited To Learn) What’s your favorite body of water? Lake River Open Sea My Reel Love™ Match Do you believe fish have souls? Yes (wrong) No (better) Only marlin and barracuda have souls, but they only live as part of the cosmic struggle between Man and Fish and to kill one is to feel the power of God coursing through your veins (correct answer) What are your favorite non-fishing pastimes? Whale Watching Lobster Trapping Splashing About In The Tidepools “The Office” on NBC! Scenario: You’re running a shad dart through a shoal of grouper when the darn things get spooked by an inshore tug two klicks west. Do you: Blind sink a flying gaff and hope for a clean hoist. Live-line your hook-set and just “walk the dog.” Pack your swivel and draw a bead on a lunker. Recast! There are plenty more fish in the sea. What is your greatest fishing dream? To discover a new species of dolphin and then hunt it to extinction To snare a beluga from right under the smug noses of those profiteering scoundrels at Seaworld To finally catch the most dangerous fish of all… Man What are you looking forward to most in your Reel Love® match? His bristly beard that scrapes your face like steel wool His foul breath, rancid with the salty sting of the sea His bad knee what can tell when the weather’s changing His pale and unblinking eye, blind to all but the tyrannical beam of the lighthouse that pierces the dark blanket of inky night Are you willing to be covered in chum and locked in a shark cage to act as live bait for Big Lucius, the thirty-foot bass what’s been the scourge of Long Island Sound since the late sixties? No! Yes. Willing? I’ve been hunting the scaly bastard for years. Douse me in fish guts, sailor. SIMILAR ARTICLES Everyone Who Might Approach You At The Airport When You Wear Your Yale Sweatshirt Mar 29, 2024 Spring Break Connections Mar 29, 2024 Bye Bye Best Friend! Mar 29, 2024