What did I do this summer? I never thought you’d ask, Stacy! It’s cool and all that you went to band camp, but my summer was well… a little different from most kids’. It all started when I was playing baseball with my best friend, Spit, when he threw his ball into the old redstone quarry. Ma and Pa always told me to stay away from there, but I needed to find the ball so I could fire off a sick home run and best Spit once and for all. Once I got to the bottom of the quarry, I couldn’t find the ball, but I did see a rope bridge. It was so long you couldn’t see the other side past the fog, but I decided to cross it anyway. When I got to the other side, I’ll never forget what I saw then— a makeshift wooden sign that read “Welcome to Camp.”

Mr. Katsopolis was the head camp counselor, and besides his weird obsession with lightning, he was a nice guy. There must have been a dozen kids or more at his famous Trash Camp, and he opened his home to each and every one of us, though he did say his real home was in the sky. He even let us meet his wife, Hera, and all his other girlfriends who would come by on the weekends. In the day, we’d roam the streets of Mr. Katsopolis’s precinct, picking up any and all the trash we could find. Big trash, little trash, young trash, old trash, we didn’t care! We knew it was our job to bring it to Mr. Katsopolis’s backyard, what he liked to cal “Mound Olympus.” Once the sun set, Mr. Katsopolis spent all night rummaging through trash, looking for some kind of amulet. He said it would reunite him with his old throne. Day and night, this is what we did. We called ourselves the Trash Boys.

Believe it or not, Trash Camp became more popular every day! Heck, by July, I was given my own squadron of little Trash Tots, and we had to start setting up bunks in Mr. Katsopolis’s backyard. We all knew it wasn’t a real summer camp, and that stealing trash is illegal, but being a part of the Trash Boys really gave us a sense of purpose. But despite all the manpower, or should I say, boypower, all we could ever find was useless stuff like gold jewelry or winning lottery tickets. All summer long… no amulet. And then one day, Mr. Katsopolis was gone. Some of us think he finally reclaimed his title as Lord of the Sky, while others think he got busted for child labor. Wherever he is, the Trash Boys will forever have an unbreakable bond, and that’s something you won’t get at band camp.

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